Self Care During Crisis
In the last couple of weeks in Queensland and New South Wales there has been severe flooding. Many have lost their homes and some even their lives. These events seem to be more and more frequent, at least in this part of the world. This unhousing leaves us feeling very unhoused metaphysically. We feel displaced, eroded and as the flood waters subside our anxieties do not always subside with them. I was inspired by a close friend who lost nearly everything material in these floods. He & his wife decided that after 7 straight days of flooding, wading, cleaning and chucking stuff out that they would take a ‘day off’ a day to rest. The was a time to recover, cry and process. This was also a move of wisdom and experience. They had been through this sort of thing before and knew that they needed to pause so they did.
So what is the answer? How to we process these large watershed (pardon the pun) events? There is never any easy way to do this, but here are some tips that may help.
Attend to physical needs first
It may seem obvious but there is no use trying to address emotional safety when there is no physical safety. Allow your self to get feed, dressed, housed and warm. The rest will follow. Maslow had something to say about a hierarchy of needs and he is still right.
Schedule a breakdown
Sometimes when we are under the pump trying to address physical safety needs we fall into our own inevitable unsafety. Allow yourself some space to schedule a breakdown. Tell your family and friends you need a couple of hours. Turn off your phone. Find somewhere that re-centres you, that brings perspective. Sit with the crisis. Befriend it. Become curious.
Selfcare is not bubble baths and chocolate
Unfortunately self-care has been bastardised into an aberration of its highest purpose. Don’t get me wrong I love bubble baths and chocolate just as much as the next guy but these elements a selfcare session does not make. Selfcare is more about safety and worth. Engaging the parts of your self that feel unsafe or not worthy helps. Of course this can also be done while sitting in a bath eating chocolate :)
Crisis is always and invitation in. An invitation down. The crisis we find ourselves in we would never chose voluntarily, but somehow crisis can bring us into life, openness and less attachment. May you go safely….. may you allow yourself to breakdown and fall into safety greater than your situation presents. May you know deeply that ‘This too will pass’